Exes And Their S***t

There are quite a number of reasons why most women hate loathe their exes.

Exes are the kind of people who show up when you least expect and thought you were long over them. Then they elicit all forms of negative feelings because you realize that you are still so damn angry with them, yet relationship blogs state that the reason why you react with anger toward an ex, is because you still harbor a soft spot for them.

Let’s face it guys, exes remind you of your stupidity levels. You question your sanity in choosing such a man or woman to date. They almost, always appear so ugly when you see them after some months of total absence from your life. Probably, you are still vengeful as a result of what they did to warrant the break up. Assuming they are the ones who f***d it all up in the first place.

 

In other scenarios, they look oh, so handsome or beautiful if you happened to be the dumpee and them, the dumper. Trust me, it hurts like hell, when you realize that your ex has moved on yet you can’t seem to find a worthy replacement of him or her. Almost like you are doomed to Singleville and to constantly remember the good times you shared. It’s even more worse, if you broke up amicably so you are left there with a dumb plastic smile on your face, when h/she tells you about a new woman or man h/she is seeing.

Your well wishing words do not even sound authentic to your own ears but you utter them anyway, just to seem really mature with how you are handling the “amicable” breakup. All the while wishing that the new man or woman in the picture goofs up really bad, to the point of being relegated to the backseat of this so called wonderful, brand new relationship.

Ever walked on a street and you suddenly smelled your ex’s scent? Then you turn in anticipation expecting to see him or her, only to realize that some people have similar natural body scents or are probably, using the same perfume or cologne that your ex used. Classic case of hallucination. But what if it was really them? How would you have reacted? Rushed into their arms? Hallucination + Psychosis.

 

Funny quotes about boyfriends exes. http://www.simwallpaper.com

Women cry over break ups. When we were younger, our friends and some close family members knew about it. They may have even offered a shoulder to lean on and some advice we hardly ever took, judging by how much, we still entertained the possibility of a rekindled relationship. When we grow older, past the early twenties mark, crying openly over a break up sounds dumb so we still cry, but make sure to conceal it perfectly.

All the more reason to hate loathe an ex because they make you act all shifty, as if you are hiding a crime made entirely worse, by other women friends pretending to be so in control of themselves that they developed selective amnesia, over the last time they shed tears for a man. Then they preach “suck it up, woman!” yet deep down you know, it’s never easy breaking off a relationship with someone else, the getting-over-it phase and then back to the dating scene again.

How green with envy you get, when you see other women with loving men in their lives and how oblivious they seem, to your dating predicaments when you get close to sharing. You wonder why you even trusted them in the first place. Dear woman, you are probably on your own during your break up phase if all the advice of “he’s not worth it” and “you are pretty, you’ll get someone soon” is anything to go by. Grieving over a failed relationship is a complete MUST whether your ex was from Pluto, with strange habits or from Earth, with equally the strangest habits.

So since our exes are so loathable, if there is such an English word even, it’s only fair that we grin devilishly, if by any chance we get a surprise call from them, after so many months of “you are no longer lovable to me so i’ll keep off” from their end. The decision to pick the call or not is up to you and so is the decision to reply to the classic, “hi?”  text. As for friendships with exes, I simply think it comes with its own bagful of challenges. There is a reason why ax and ex sound almost similar. Axing the ex for good is a better option for me.

 

With sarcasm and dark humor from Proudly Feminist.

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