Women, stop assaulting men.

A very recent survey in my country, came up with the following results that 1 in 10 Kenyan men have either been physically or sexually assaulted by the women in their lives be it girlfriends or wives. It’s very interesting that i wanted to blog about this earlier today before checking the day’s Standard Newspaper which coincidentally carries a main feature concerning violence against men when i finally checked. And while i’m an advocate for women’s rights, i don’t at all agree with women assaulting men. In fact, i find it stupid no matter what the man has done or not done to warrant the discipline.



And by the way, this photo is of a real person who was attacked by his wife in Kenya some years back so you can imagine the kind of violence going on in homes.

I believe that i have said it here before that any man who brings out the worst in a woman is a complete NO-NO. Why women stay with men who turn them into ugly beasts in character remains a mystery to me. If you are the sole provider in the home with a man purporting to be your husband who drinks from before day break to sunset, pees on himself in his drunken stupor, demands for sex while as high as a kite and wouldn’t get nor keep a job, then you have no business staying with that man.

Take your kids and go even though many African communities hold the notion that the children belong to the father. Take your children with you because you do not want your no good, so called husband to infect them with his irresponsibility. Take them because you provide for them and do not trust that this man will change and become a provider once you have left. Take them with you because you want to protect them from molestation, God forbid or neglect.

We hear it in the news all the time. A woman who left her kids behind after a marriage gone sour only to have the man molest his own daughter or daughters or worst case scenario, molest his son or sons as a form of revenge for the woman leaving. I see no need for a woman to stay with such a kind of man only to begin battering him because of the pent up anger and bitterness he has caused her.

Forget about society for once women and what it considers ideal and save yourself from turning into a raging beast, who wouldn’t hesitate to pick up a panga (machete) and slash this man’s face the same way you would slash grass.

One of the experts in today’s paper has spoken of women becoming more violent in recent years. One of the victims of domestic violence featured speaks of a once wonderful Christian woman who turned into an animal once they got married.

Dear men, there is something called Narcissistic Personality Disorder which i have spent quite a considerable amount of time reading about for personal reasons. What happens with a person suffering from NPD is that this person will create a false endearing image to outsiders but in the real sense behind closed doors and once in a comfortable place with their intended victim, she or he happens to be emotionally abusive, vindictive, verbally, sexually or physically abusive, manipulative, possessive and controlling.

When dating a person with NPD, you will feel as if you are the luckiest person in the world for having them because they are fun to be around. They will treat you like a prince and act so wonderfully around you. That is not them. That is a created image for purposes of hiding things they consider flaws in them. Anyone who has dealt with NPD knows that these people are very self critical and hateful of themselves and these same things are what they will begin projecting to their victims once in a marriage with them.

I do not believe in a woman changing for the worst after marriage. Do a background check plus some reasonable amount of reading on NPD and you will realize that these men or women were actually wolves in sheep clothing just waiting for the right moment to switch personalities. For the men who have had to endure such kinds of spouses or girlfriends, i truly empathize. And yes, i’m a woman and i do agree that there are abusive women out there.

Women walking around with personality disorders which they themselves do not know they are suffering from. Changing personality disorders in a person is hardly successful due to the fact that most who are afflicted have a huge difficulty actually admitting to having such. The only solution for a man in such a situation if it can’t be fixed is to leave the minute you notice a sudden drastic change in character because with NPD, it will be a lifetime trouble for you.

And not only NPD. Other disorders such as Borderline Personality Disorders as well as Bi polar disorders where the person may exhibit violent tendencies too and may not be in a position to control these extremeties.

A woman who feels the need to attack a man because she is aggrieved is actually a coward. I say this with a lot of confidence because i have heard of very disastrous results from  cowardly women who decided to attack men they felt had aggrieved them or  women they suspected of fooling around with their man.

My aunt works in a hospital. One evening just before close of business hours, a young woman was brought in scalded by hot water by some woman who had mistaken her for her husband’s mistress. This girl was in pain and injured just because this cowardly, paranoid woman had found her visiting her husband’s sister and had assumed since she was the only outsider apart from her husband and his sister in the house, then she must be messing around with her man.

Pretending to want to cook rice, the woman boiled hot water on the stove in the same house and suddenly poured it on the visitor. Someone else’s daughter who had just arrived in the town for her internship and was totally innocent. How crazy can one get?! That incident had highly irritated my aunt and her co-workers.

I say this yet again, women, any man who makes you feel terrible, paranoid or insecure is no good for you. Do not resort to violence with such a kind of man. Hold your head up high and leave him for good.

I feel like women are stooping too low if they continue engaging in such horrendous acts when they had an option to walk out. In such a war, you can never win because the man will continue being the man he is and you will continue worsening in your newly acquired beast like tendencies, only to find yourself unfortunately behind bars for domestic violence related crime.


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